Day 9: The Shaft
[14:16] <DesertBell> Hey how come both of the bisexual companions in DAO are rogues?
[14:16] <Southpaw> :O
[14:16] <DesertBell> Never noticed that before
[14:16] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Because rogues do it from behind.
[14:17] <Southpaw> :p
[14:17] <DesertBell> I accept this logic.
[14:18] <Seren-y-Gogledd> He fiddles with the thing a lot
[14:18] <DesertBell> He can fiddle with MY thing a lot…
[14:21] <DesertBell> Wanna go talk to Dat Ash?
[14:22] <Southpaw> You wanted to yell at her, if I remember correctly
[14:22] <DesertBell> I’m just saying, we need renegade points.
[14:23] <DesertBell> I don’t WANT to yell at her, I just think she should kind of… take one for the team
[14:23] <DesertBell> Bonus: Taking one for the team NOW kind of warms her up for later.
[14:24] <Dame_Seren> Being an ass for the greater good, then.
[14:24] <Southpaw> Poor Ash. First she gets yelled at, then she gets nuked.
[14:39] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Wrex could probably step on a volus.
[14:39] <Southpaw> Or bounce one like a basketball
[14:40] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Do you think their suits would pop?
[14:40] <Seren-y-Gogledd> I just imagined him stepping on loads of volus, making fart noises with each one.
[14:43] * DesertBell does not want to talk to Tali.
[14:43] <DesertBell> Tali?
[14:43] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Dare we talk to Tali again?
[14:44] <Southpaw> …dice time. 1 yes, 2 no
[14:44] <Southpaw> 1 :’(
[14:44] <DesertBell> Sigh.
[14:45] <Southpaw> I see how it’s going to be, dice.
(Tali is complaining about the Normandy being too quiet, and asks Shepard how she sleeps with all the silence.)
[14:47] <DesertBell> How do I sleep at night? Well, I play back the recording of our last conversation and it knocks me right out.
[14:47] <DesertBell> THE SILENCE.
[14:47] <DesertBell> O.O
[14:47] <DesertBell> THE SILENCE ARE ON THE NORMANDY. It all makes so much sense now.
[14:48] <Dame_Seren> TALI IS A SILENT
[14:48] <DesertBell> That’s why the mask. So people remember her
[14:48] <Dame_Seren> The mask is to avoid being forgotten
[14:48] <DesertBell> Holy shit the quarians are Silents. It all makes so much sense now.
[14:48] <Dame_Seren> Ninja’d
[14:48] <Southpaw> I have no idea what you are talking about
[14:49] <DesertBell> You should watch Doctor Who.
[14:49] <Southpaw> Yeah, I really should.
Admiral Hackett contacts Shepard with a mission.
[14:54] <DesertBell> SHOCKING, Fifth Fleet wants something.
[14:55] <Southpaw> They’re a bunch of whiny babies who can’t get shit done without us.
[14:56] <Southpaw> Say, –get a bomb disposal team
[14:57] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Shepard, you’re a fecking engineer.
[14:57] <DesertBell> lol
[15:01] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Drivin’ mah space car up a mountain
[15:02] <DesertBell> drivin mah space car OFF a mountain.
[15:02] <Southpaw> I’m at the shaft and there is talk
[15:02] <DesertBell> That’s what she said
[15:02] <Southpaw> OH DEAR
[15:02] <Southpaw> Walked straight into it
[15:08] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Going for the shaft now.
[15:08] <DesertBell> That’s what she said.
[15:08] <Southpaw> I can’t believe I walked into that one
[15:10] <Seren-y-Gogledd> I just drove down a near-vertical cliff face.
[15:10] <Southpaw> Mako is the best
[15:10] <Seren-y-Gogledd> And I mean down, not off.
[15:11] <DesertBell> I rocket boosted my ass over the edge and fell.
[15:11] <DesertBell> I imagined Kaidan screaming in terror the whole time.
[15:12] <Southpaw> Poor feller
[15:13] <Seren-y-Gogledd> They made the wrong kind of multiplayer. Mako racing FTW!
[15:14] <Southpaw> OH MAN THAT WOULD BE TOO AWESOME FOR WORDS
[15:14] <Seren-y-Gogledd> With bonuses for going up mountains!
[15:14] <DesertBell> That is brilliant.
[15:15] <Southpaw> Dammit, Bioware should hire you
15:15] <DesertBell> My husband likes to watch me go up mountains: “You’re never going to make it. Look, you’re stuck, you aren’t moving, why aren’t you just going back down?”
[15:15] <Southpaw> lolol
[15:15] <DesertBell> I’m always like, “Shut up, there’s a trick to this.”
[15:16] <Southpaw> Oblivious Shep is oblivious. Wrex knows it’s a trap
[15:17] <Seren-y-Gogledd> LOL Wrex.
Our heroes find out that the mission was a trap.
[15:18] <DesertBell> Wrex is like, “Goddammit woman, I TOLD you this was a trap.”
[15:20] <Southpaw> Squeeee the bf is playing Dragon Age
[15:21] <DesertBell> “who cares?”
[15:22] <DesertBell> For the record… “Who cares” was dialog and not a commentary on your boyfriend playing Dragon Age.
[15:22] <Southpaw> I know.
Mocking an NPC’s dialog…
[15:22] <DesertBell> I always imagine this guy saying, “And it would’ve worked, too, if it weren’t for you meddling kids!”
[15:23] <DesertBell> FAILED FAILED FAILED
[15:23] <Southpaw> …
[15:23] <Southpaw> Does it echo in here?
[15:23] <DesertBell> So, I THINK he’s saying his plan… failed?
Kaidan says, “What do we do now?”
[15:25] <DesertBell> … I have some ideas about what we can do now, Alenko. Wrex, close your eyes.
Hackett has another mission for Shepard…
[15:47] <DesertBell> HACKETT! What a surprise.
[16:07] <DesertBell> Jesus Hackett.
[16:07] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Hello there Hackett
[16:07] <DesertBell> Or rather, “Jesus, Hackett!”
[16:07] <DesertBell> I did not mean to imply that Hackett was in fact a resurrected deity.
[16:07] <Southpaw> LOLOL
[16:08] <Southpaw> CAN’T THEY GET ANYTHING DONE BY THEMSELVES?
[16:08] <DesertBell> “You’re a spectre, Shepard. And clearly you have nothing better to do.”
[16:09] <Southpaw> “You’re spectre so we will boss you around like there’s no tomorrow”
[16:09] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Never mind stopping Saren and saving the galaxy, run our errands!
[16:10] <DesertBell> “When you’re done with that, we ran out of milk at Alliance Command and I hate dry cereal.”
[16:11] <DesertBell> Anyone remember what was on Trebin?
[16:11] <Seren-y-Gogledd> I think a thresher maw
[16:11] <DesertBell> Ew. Do not want.
[16:11] <Southpaw> Eeeep
[16:12] <DesertBell> Check it out: You can kill the human reaper with two hits from the Cain… the Threshew Maw takes two hits and STILL NEEDS ATTACKING.
[16:12] <DesertBell> Clearly, Thresher Maws > Reapers.
[16:12] <DesertBell> OMG, I just figured out how to save the galaxy.