Day 28: Butt Cap

[22:32] <DesertBell> Man, now I want to skip ME1MPXP and make cookies. That can’t be right. I think my brain is broken.

[22:32] <Seren-y-Gogledd> That is seriously broken

[22:32] <DesertBell> Pumpkiny cookies

[22:32] <Southpaw> Disturbing

[22:32] <DesertBell> OOh with cream cheese frosting

[22:32] <Southpaw> *drool*

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[22:34] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Also, having played all classes, Engineer is my favourite. Maybe because of you two.

[22:35] <DesertBell> Awwww *sniffle*

[22:35] <Southpaw> :D

[22:35] <Seren-y-Gogledd> (Overload certainly helps though)

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[22:37] <Seren-y-Gogledd> So is there any sidequesting we need to do or shall we go get cockblocked by Joker?

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[22:38] <DesertBell> To the Citadel?

[22:39] <Seren-y-Gogledd> To the Batcave!

[22:39] <DesertBell> Wrong Joker.

[22:39] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Er, Citadel.

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[22:39] <DesertBell> This tea kind of tastes like spicy ass.

[22:39] <Southpaw> *guffaw*

[22:39] <Seren-y-Gogledd> I’m not even going to ask.

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The Locker Scene.

[22:45] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Yikes, if we reload, that’s a LOT to redo

[22:46] <DesertBell> Yeah, but then we get to do this again.

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[22:52] <Seren-y-Gogledd> From where she’s sitting, that’s one hell of a codpurse view.

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[22:54] <DesertBell>I LOVE THAT SCENE

[22:55] <Southpaw> I think it’s my favourite scene in anything ever

[22:55] <Seren-y-Gogledd> You have a separate save just for that, don’t you?

[22:55] <DesertBell> …possibly just made one.

[22:55] <Southpaw> Damn, I need to make one.

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[22:56] <DesertBell> Haha Kaidan. “You can see half the citadel from up here”

[22:57] <DesertBell> That’s not all you can see, how freaking tight is his armor?

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[22:58] <Southpaw> Aaaand I can see inside Wrex’s suit again

[22:58] <DesertBell> ….ew.

[22:58] <Southpaw> Yeah.

[22:58] <DesertBell> So, while you’re in there, 1 or 2?

[22:58] <Southpaw> Wait, what?

[22:59] <DesertBell> penii

[22:59] <Southpaw> …oh. OH. NO no no no

[22:59] <Southpaw> Just his back hump

[22:59] <DesertBell> Suuuure

[22:59] <Southpaw> *gets brain bleach*

[22:59] <DesertBell> Yeah, it’s WAAAY to late for THAT.

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Conrad asks to be made a Spectre:

[23:05] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Is he fucking serious?

[23:06] <DesertBell> Shep looks like she’s trying not to laugh and Kaidan looks like, “Oh for fuck’s sake”

[23:07] <Southpaw> Heck, let’s go renegade. — there are no good fights

Shepard pulls a gun on Conrad.

[23:07] <Southpaw> *evil cackle*

[23:08] <DesertBell> He whined. That’s hot.

[23:08] <DesertBell> *eyeroll*

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Talking to Saracino, Shepard refuses to be a racist asshole. Saracino then asks her to appear in his advertising.

[23:16] <DesertBell> “Hey, I think you’re a racist douche.” “Understood. Want to advertise for my campaign?”

[23:16] <DesertBell> He is NOT my favorite politician on the Citadel.

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[23:16] <Seren-y-Gogledd> –I won’t support you.

[23:17] <Southpaw> “with all due respect, you’re a douchenozzle”

[23:17] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Remember to dickpunch Terra Firma.

[23:17] <Southpaw> Yes >:(

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[23:17] <DesertBell> LMAO The protesters are saying “Freedom isn’t free”

[23:17] <DesertBell> Dying

[23:18] <Southpaw> Yup, reminds me of …a song

[23:18] <DesertBell> HAHA

[23:18] <DesertBell> “No blood for Aliens”

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Elias calls Shepard “Soldier”.

[23:20] <Seren-y-Gogledd> ENGINEER, YOU PRICK.

[23:20] <Southpaw> *snortle*

[23:20] <DesertBell> Clearly, there is only one option here. “–I’m not just a soldier.”

[23:21] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Finally, it paid off.

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Talking to Elias, the drug addicted politician. He’s racist.

[23:23] <Seren-y-Gogledd> OK, he’s a douche.

[23:23] <DesertBell> Yeah… he’s an asshat

[23:23] <DesertBell> An anal bowler

[23:23] <DesertBell> A rectal chapeau

[23:24] <Southpaw> Wh- hahaha

[23:25] <DesertBell> A colonic beret

[23:26] <Southpaw> Those are some inventive names you’re calling him

[23:26] <DesertBell> I’m running out of ass terms, though

[23:26] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Butt cap.

[23:26] <DesertBell> A hemorrhoid tophat.

[23:26] <Southpaw> *spittake*

[23:27] <DesertBell> –you’re an asshole. I mean addict.

[23:27] <Southpaw> Butt cap is very simple yet effective

[23:27] <DesertBell> I agree. Short and to the point.

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[23:28] <DesertBell> Speaking of to the point

[23:28] <DesertBell> I bought a new wreath for the front door yesterday, and it has a couple ornaments on it that I swear to TIM look a lot like butt plugs.

[23:29] <DesertBell> I was like, “It’s on sale, but… buttplug Christmas?”

[23:29] <Southpaw> :o

[23:30] <Southpaw> And you bought it?

[23:30] <DesertBell> Yup.

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Doing the quest where you cheat on the gambling machines:

[23:43] <Southpaw> I guess I got busted

[23:44] <Southpaw> He’s like “you’re using that device, did he give it to you? I can’t let you keep it”

[23:46] <Seren-y-Gogledd> I just got busted

[23:47] <Southpaw> Bell?

[23:47] <DesertBell> still going

Two minutes later:

[23:49] <DesertBell> FINALLY

[23:50] <Seren-y-Gogledd> Well of course Queen Ninja would struggle to get caught.

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Go ToDay 29: And Suddenly, It Was Over

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